In thaw of anxiety, for the shapeless shapes in my brain

I am consumed by fear

I breathe out smoke not air

I feel my acid reflux has gone way overwhelmed

my chest running

all too compressed 

I feel somewhere where my blood flows a bomb 

is blown

It blocks my airways

I’m bloody dehydrated

My mind’s so big full of riddles from someone else’s maze

I can’t touch; can’t fart

I think they would stare

at my greatest fear

freaking out in my brain.

trapped in a bread store pressed down

and suffocated.

He could rip me to bits, I’m his slave

weaker than a thread when pulled so be it

They said count to 100 sheep,

infinite questions my tongue wants to urinate

like a tapping of a pencil,

the sound of a fan, 

three clicks of your fingers,

it swirls and twirls me down to a hole

this is insane!

Locked in a box with a razor on my back

unmoved, disgruntled

the box with its wall less walls

I’d like to turn off my thoughts

could I make it that far?

to hold my platter of splatter green and hazy painting mind?

or

do you think i constantly do something wrong,

a visit to the doctor is fine?